Monday, September 20, 2010


The Royal Flush-- Priceless

Perhaps everyone won't find this topic tasteful. I know I certainly don't. For my faithful readers -- both of you -- you know that we recently moved into our beautiful 1920's cottage. The historical architecture of our home has been really carefully maintained -- or in spaces restored. I love this about the space -- mostly. The upstairs family bath -- which initially was the only bath -- still sports its original tub -- tile -- medicine cabinet -- flooring -- and possibly sink. A previous owner told us that he had a nice vanity installed there. The most recent owner found the old sink hanging on a wall in the basement and hauled it upstairs to "return to the era". Yep, hot water on one side, cold on the other. If you wish to wash with warm water, you must swish your hands back and forth very quickly between the spigots. However interesting that tidbit about the sink maybe, it is really merely background to my story. The old water closet also still offers the original toilet! Talk about an amazing antique! This puppy was top of the line back in 1924 -- a Saneto Crane air toilet! Because early indoor plumbing lacked a vertical venting system, this toilet has it's own personal vent. The water enters the tank from the wall -- at about 4 feet off of the floor. The vent sits behind the toilet -- beneath the tank -- about the same height as the toilet seat. The drain sits slightly forward of the modern space

Being a bit of a retro fan, I don't mind the antique bathroom. Besides, I have a beautiful master bath with jetted garden tub and separate shower, modern toilet, and double vanity. I don't even use the "family bath". My boys use it. Did I mention that the original tile is pink? I try to describe it as "salmon." The guys call it the Barbie bathroom. They also don't like to clean it.

Upon first moving in, I discovered something icky growing in the bottom of the antique toilet bowl. The plumber diagnosed this problem as lime. No, I didn't call the plumber because of the gray film growing down the drain. I know to call the Tidy Bowl man for that kind of problem. Unfortunately, about the time I tackled the icky growth, I discovered that the toilet was actually leaking. For this, we called the plumber.

Washington Avenue is famous in Oshkosh as the historic street. The guy who owns the plumbing company lives down the street from us. His employee came in -- took one look at the toilet and said, "hm". He should have said "h$m". He almost immediately assessed the problem --diagnosed where the crack was and called to check if they had the parts in stock. After making a few calls -- he announced that this would be a 4 hour job -- and would run in excess of $500.00. Yep -- you are reading that correctly -- $500.00. And your mind went in an entirely different direction when I announced that my topic might be in poor taste!

$619.00 was the final total -- speaking of obscene! I am happy to say that the home warranty covered a majority -- but not quite all of the bill for fixing the primitive potty! We did get to "donate" toward the cause from our own pocket as well.

Perhaps you are thinking -- good grief -- why didn't you just buy a new potty with a retro look to it? -- and saved some $$ ? -- Good question! -- Remember when I carefully described my antique potty. Remember how I explained the location of the water line -- where the drain sits -- the vent spot? Right. To replace the poor ol' potty with a new one would require major demo, and re-plumbing, re-plastering, re-painting -- to the tune of approximately $1500! Makes the repair bill sound better doesn't it?

To be fair, I can't say that we flushed money down the toilet because the toilet is repaired! It no longer leaks! We're sitting pretty! Now if I could just get those boys to clean the bathroom consistently!